Now that we're talking about equality of opportunities and fair treatment and minorities being empowered and etc, etc, etc. I bring to you another though. If everybody but white males are equal, what are they equal to?
Something that happened recently made me think about true equality. One of the women I work with is also a single mom and she's raising two boys, similar ages as mine. She was asking if I knew of a place where her 5 year old boy could learn how to dance. It dawned on me that we both were unable to find spaces where dance classes are not only for girls. Then I started wondering what else is being denied from our sons? We are so concerned about women's and girls' rights, that we are forgetting that by asking for equality, we need to consider the inclusion of men and boys into activities and places where we women are the only ones allowed.
There are no changing tables on men's public restrooms, not even inside the restrooms in department stores or malls. Is considered normal to see a little girl playing with toy trucks and cars, as well as with toy tool sets, but honestly, how many of us would find it normal to see a boy asking his parents for a tea set or a kitchen? And last time I checked, men are great chefs.
In some countries, men can ask their employer for paternity leave if the just adopted a baby, but do they get paternity leave in all countries when they had a baby? No. If a woman decides to go back to work as soon as she can after having a baby and comes home tired and doesn't want to deal with changing diapers and hires a nanny for that purpose, we applaud her decision, if a man decides he's not going to be part of the diaper changing experience, he's an irresponsible father.
It is true that we have lived with the stigma of double standards and are tired of being considered unable to perform certain activities, but aren't we doing the same to men?
If a couple takes the decision of having kids and one of them has to stay home to raise them, shouldn't be the man's right to stay home if it works out better for them? Why can't a man be considered better at dealing with domestic issues?
Some of my male friends have been talking lately about wanting to have kids, but they are stuck since for them, it is necessary to first find a wife that wants kids. It is this recent trend of men being in touch with their feelings that makes them realize that they, unlike us, need more steps to get to paternity than us, since all we need is an ejaculation at the right time of the month. Men, if they decide to be single parents, have to share their kids with the mother, women don't have to have sex to get a baby if they choose to be artificially inseminated.
I think that now that we are commemorating 100 years of the struggle for equal rights for women, and thinking about all the violence women have to endure, we should think about the 21st century men and the equality they're asking for.
Take it or leave it, but after all... I was just thinking.
